Category Archives: Relationships

Articles, Education, Family, Prophecy, Teaching

Good-bye, Ebenezer Scrooge: A Case for Christmas

It’s name recognition is universal and, until recently, so was its appeal.
Who can resist a family dinner with roast turkey, bread dressing, Christmas pudding, and all the trimmings?
Or going into the living room, a warm fire roaring, hot chocolate topped with marshmallows in the mug, while gleeful children unwrap presents found under the Christmas tree?
Or listening to the public singing of Christmas carols, with those time-honoured verses are still able to stir the soul?
Yes, Christmas still evokes much enthusiasm throughout the world, and not just in the West. Asia goes crazy over Christmas, including places like Indonesia, Singapore, Thailand, and Japan.
Even in ‘laid-back’ Australia, where a few even refer to it as ‘Chrissie,’ Christmas is still a very popular day off. Aussies relish the big meal, the family gathering, and, if possible, a splash at the beach while throwing ‘another shrimp on the barbie.’
In his best-selling book, A Christmas Carol (1843), Charles Dickens wrote about a miser called Ebenezer Scrooge, who tried to throw a wet blanket on Christmas. He immortalised the words, ‘Bah! Humbug!’ Scrooge was eventually transformed into a kinder, gentler man, because of the Christmas spirit.
Today, amazingly, a postmodern spirit of Ebenezer Scrooge has permeated western society. Christmas has been under a concerted attack from two quarters.
Secularists: Courtesy of political correctness, some secularists have declared war against Christmas. They want to ban displays of Nativity Scenes on public property since, they claim, it crosses the boundary of separating church and state. They also want to ban the greeting ‘Merry Christmas,’ lest it offend non-Christians (personally, I know many non-Christians living in the West who also enthusiastically observe some, or all, or the Christmas activities). Vacuous phrases like ‘Happy Holidays’ and ‘Compliments of the Season’ are offered instead.
Christians: Christmas is also under assault by some Christians, too. Just this year I heard a normally mild mannered Christian become agitated and militant, just at the mention of the word ‘Christmas.’ This individual insisted that Christmas is a non-Biblical, non-obligatory, downright pagan event that should have no part in the life of a Christian. Not content that they and their family boycott Christmas, this person tried to ‘proselytise’ others to join the Christmas boycott.
Chances are, this individual is facing an uphill battle. And rightly so.
I, for one as a Bible teacher and one that endeavours to train people to live a Biblically-correct, Spirit-filled, God-honouring life, have no problem whatsoever in observing Christmas. Here are some reasons:
BIBLICAL EVENT, NOT BIBLICAL COMMAND
The Christmas story, as found in the gospels of Matthew and Luke, are part of the great narrative of the coming Saviour. While no where are we commanded in Scripture to observe the birth of Christ (indeed, it is highly unlikely that December 25th is the day of His birth – and remember, the Queen’s Birthday Holiday is in June, though her actual birthday is in April), we are still reflecting on two important Biblical events:
1.    The Incarnation of Christ: ‘And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us ….’  John 1:14;
2.    Emmanuel: Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us – Matthew 1:23.
PAGAN BUT PURIFIED
Christian critics claim that Christmas is a pagan holiday. Some elements, like the December 25th coinciding with the winter solstice and/or the Christmas tree, could have pagan origins. For some, this is like eating meat offered to idols. But for others, when something is dedicated to God, it is no longer unclean. After all, the pagan city of Jebus, after being captured by King David, was converted into Jerusalem, the holy city.
TIME OF REST, FAMILY, FELLOWSHIP
Many people live ridiculously busy lives. Christmas is a time to put on the brakes, rest, relax, and have family time or interaction with friends. Most people find this an immensely gratifying experience.
OPPORTUNITY TO PROCLAIM CHRIST IN AN INCREASINGLY SECULAR SOCIETY
With so much indifference and antagonism to the gospel message, Christmas is a golden opportunity to publicly tell the gospel of Christ – with impunity! That’s why many churches use this occasion to have concerts, plays, and other forms of community outreach. Few can object to such gospel pageantry because, after all, ‘It’s Christmas Time.’
CHANCE TO GET PEOPLE INTO CHURCH
For some people, Christmas may be the only time in the year they will darken the door of a church. As such, they become a ‘captive audience.’ This again is a chance to show them the meaning of Christmas – it is about Christ. As the saying goes, ‘Jesus is the Reason for the Season.’
Let’s remember that celebrating Christmas is ‘optional.’ One’s eternal salvation is not dependant on whether a person observes this holiday, or not. So if you choose to not to celebrate, that’s perfectly fine; provided, you don’t emulate Ebenezer Scrooge and try to spoil it for the majority who do.
We would do well to remember the words of the Apostle Paul in Romans 14:5-6:
One person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind. 16 He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord; and he who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observe it ….
As for Ebenezer Scrooge, may he rest in peace (RIP).

Articles, Education, Family, Teaching

MARRIAGE: Find the Acronym

Advertise here with Beacon AdsMARRIAGE (FIND THE ACRONYM!) On the 15th April, 1995, the Rev. Jan Croucher (my wife) and I ‘celebrated’ the marriage of our daughter Amanda, to John Southwell. The beautiful service at the Heathmont Baptist Church in Melbourne, Victoria, began with Amanda’s four cousins – sisters who are all brilliant musicians – playing Bach’s Air on the […]

Articles, Bible, Education, Family, Prophecy, Teaching

Inheriting the Earth: The Power of Biblical Meekness PART TWO

In Part One we were introduced to the concept of Biblical meekness, which comes with the superlative promise: The meek shall inherit the earth (Psalm 37:11; Matthew 5:5). In essence, meekness is submission to God and His grace, letting Him carry us, fight our battles, and use us as He wills. The two meekest men in the Bible were Moses and Jesus, yet both of them were mightily used of God in acts of power.
The meek do not ‘fight for their rights,’ actively seek vengeance or vindication, strive in their own strength or live off man-made, home-cooked ‘good ideas.’ They live and labour according to God’s terms, timing, and territory. The meek simply keep single-minded and focused on what God has called them to do.
ISAAC: MEEKNESS IN ACTION
A classic example of this principle, and how to inherit the earth, is found in the patriarch Isaac in Genesis 26:16-22. God commanded Isaac to remain in Canaan, a land he was destined to inherit. Amazingly, this was during a time of intense famine. When food was scarce in Canaan, the natural response was to travel to nearby Egypt, where the Nile River and its alluvial rich overflow normally guaranteed a steady food supply.
Certainly, Isaac’s father Abraham, and son Jacob, did go to Egypt when famine hit in Canaan during their day. Yet when Isaac tried to make the same move, God intervened and told him to stay put. He would bless him in the land of promise, drought, famine, and all. Meekness meant trusting God and committing all to him.
Ever energetic, Isaac was busy sowing in the land and reaping 100-fold (Genesis 26:12). That was a miracle, considering that the Negev wilderness is dry, even in normal times, let alone in a season of dryness.
The neighbouring Philistines became jealous of his success and expelled him from the city of Gerar. It was most unfair, but Isaac decided not to fight for justice but to keep on labouring in his inheritance. God’s justice towards Isaac would outstripped any compensation this world can offer.
The patriarch began to dig wells or re-dig wells in the Negev, where his father Abraham had dug. Wells not only brought water but served as a stake to claim the land. At least twice the Philistines protested that the wells belong to them, even though Isaac was the one who dug them. He did not argue or stop fulfilling his call. He kept his powder dry, relinquished the wells to his opponents, and kept digging elsewhere. Isaac knew that the promise of God to inherit the land would come in God’s timing and God’s way.
Isaac’s meekness netted him a wonderful reprieve called Rehoboth (Genesis 26:22). Here was a ‘Philistine-free zone’ were there is room, water, fruitfulness, and no strife. Every believer needs to visit Rehoboth, periodically if not regularly.
What is remarkable is that Isaac’s spirit of meekness did not make him look weak, but strong. Eventually, his enemies met with him and sued for peace.
The reason was that the blessing of God appeared prominently on his life. Wherever his plough laboured, there was a bumper crop. Wherever his spade touch, a well of springing water resulted. When opposition hit, he glided over it like a stream over a stubborn rock. To fight such a God-blessed man like Isaac would mean to fight against God Himself.
Then he came across Beersheba, well of seven, which became the patriarchs winter capital. The land of Canaan was now within Isaac’s reach and he never had to fire a shot.
MEEKNESS FOR TODAY
Isaac’s exemplary conduct contradicts our current culture, which focuses on ‘rights,’ ‘entitlement,’ and ‘self-interest.’ The problem with this attitude is that as soon as you drop your spade (shovel) and pick up your boxing gloves to fight your enemy, they have already won. The reason is that you are no longer doing what God has called you to, but instead you are distracted by a battle that is best left with God. Often, these battles can be lengthy and tiresome. So even if you win the battle, you truly lose the war. Second, by taking up the fight yourself, you are not demonstrating the power of faith and trust whereby God can fight your battle and win your prize.
Except in rare situations, the Biblical meek don’t even bother responding to their opponents. The work of God is simply too great (remember Nehemiah: he did not want to stop building the walls of Jerusalem in order to debate his enemies).
The meek reserve their focus on one thing: doing God’s will. All the other issues they leave for God to sort out. Many take the lower road, which leads to the barnyard. It can be messy, battling with the chickens and other poultry who can’t even fly. Or, you can take the ‘higher way’ of Biblical meekness, where the eagles rule the skies. Those who choose this way travel faster, farther, and truly inherit the earth.
Meekness
A spirit of empowerment, not entitlement;
overcoming, not overcome;
inheritance, not infirmity;
grace, not greed;
victory, not victimhood.
By meekness you interface with
Almighty God Himself
So that when He inherits the earth (Psalm 24:1);

                                                  You inherit it with Him

Articles, Bible, Education, Family, Prophecy, Teaching

When All is Lost – Why Study the Book of Ruth

The circumstances could not have been more tragic. A Judean woman moves to Moab because of famine in her homeland. After arrival to this foreign land her husband dies an untimely death. Her two sons marry local Moabite girls, but like their father, they also die prematurely. There were no children, either. With no government safety net or church support, or children to send out to work, the situation was hopeless.
What can you do in such circumstances?
Welcome to the Book of Ruth. Far from being a quaint, romantic tale, Ruth is a powerful manifesto of redemption – from tragedy to triumph. When all seems to be lost, redemption comes in and turns everything around –  even more than you can imagine.
And there is more. What was really at stake was not merely the fortunes of two widows – it was the Messianic lineage itself from Abraham to David. The redemption of Ruth restored this broken line. Though a Gentile from a despised race, Ruth became an honoured matriarch who is named an ancestor of the Messiah (Matthew 1:5).
What were the keys that turned this hopeless situation around?
First, it was Ruth’s faithfulness. She put all her trust in the God of Israel. Her faithfulness to God is matched by her legendary care of her widowed mother-in-law, Naomi. ‘Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God’ Ruth 1:16ff (NKJV) was her famous statement of commitment.
Second, God’s faithfulness. The LORD made provision for such tragedies through two means. First, regarding food for the needy, Israelites were commanded to leave the corners and fringes of their harvest field untouched so that the poor, stranger, fatherless, and widows can glean therein and have food (Leviticus 19:10; Deuteronomy 24:21). Ruth went to glean in the fields and caught the attention of an older man named Boaz.
Another provision of God was the ‘kinsmen-redeemer’ or go’el in Hebrew. This means a male relative (brother) takes on the widow and raises up a descendant for the deceased brother. This is called ‘Levirate Marriage,’ described in Deuteronomy 25. Since Naomi had no more sons to offer Ruth, here again all seemed lost.
Yet this same Boaz, who took notice of Ruth in his harvest field, also happened to be a relative. When Naomi saw the favour Ruth enjoyed in the eyes of Boaz, she ‘nudged’ her to invite him to do the duty of a kinsman-redeemer. The ‘Naomi nudge’ at home turned into a ‘Ruth nudge’ at the threshing floor. Once he was nudged, Boaz, son of Salmon and Rahab, wasted no time in trying to secure Ruth’s redemption.
After quickly clearing the last hurdle, Boaz married Ruth, they had a son called OBED, and redemption came to Ruth, Naomi, Elimelech, Mahlon and Chilion. Ruth, daughter-in-law of Rahab, became the great-grandmother of David. The Messianic line was preserved.
The bottom line: When you put all your trust in the LORD, there is never a situation where ‘all is lost.’ God’s redemption means you will find your blessing, with dividends.
Hebrew:  Ruth
Author:  Unknown. Probably written in the time of David, great-grandson of Ruth.
Christ:  Kinsman-Redeemer.  Go’el
1.       He was a blood relative to Israel and Son of man to the Gentiles.
2.       Redeemer must be free Himself. Christ is totally free.
3.       Purchased redemption with His priceless blood (Boaz did it with money).
4.       Needs to buy back forfeited inheritance. Christ the Redeemer has the power to buy back all that was lost.
5.       Must be willing to marry the widow. Christ has a bride (Romans 7:4).
Theme: Power of Redemption

Book of Ruth:

A Simple Outline
CHAPTER ONE: Tragedy for Naomi & Ruth
LOCATION: Moab
The Unfortunate Move of Elimelech & Naomi
1:1-5
Ruth’s Transformational Decision
1:6-18
Ruth Moves to Judah with Naomi
1:19-22
CHAPTER TWO: The Toil of Ruth
LOCATION: Fields of Boaz
Ruth Gleans in Boaz’s Field
2:1-3
Ruth Finds Favour With Boaz
2:4-18
Naomi Revives
2:19-23
CHAPTER THREE: Trust in Action
LOCATION: Threshingfloor
Naomi ‘Nudges’ Ruth Towards Boaz
3:1-5
Ruth ‘Nudges’ Boaz
3:6-9
Boaz Agrees to be a Kinsman-Redeemer
3:10-15
Naomi Transformed: From Pessimist to Optimist
3:16-18
CHAPTER FOUR: Triumph and Redemption
Location: Bethlehem City Gate
Boaz Redeems
4:1-10
Boaz Marries Ruth
4:11-12
Ruth Gives Birth to Obed
4:13-17
Genealogy of David
4:18-22
Note: We offer an 8 hour audio MP3 verse-by-verse commentary on the Book of Ruth, including 30 pages of printable PDF notes. It is part of our larger ‘Understanding the Bible Series.’ For further information, go to
http://www.tan.org.au/shop/understanding-the-book-of-ruth/  for a copy sent in the mail
OR
Immediate download:

http://www.tan.org.au/shop/understanding-the-book-of-ruth-digital-download-audio-mp3/
Articles, Education, Prophecy, Relationships, Teaching

FROM ‘DE FACTO’ TO ‘DE JURE:

FROM ‘DE FACTO’ TO ‘DE JURE:’
Finding Legitimacy in an Immoral World
Kameel Majdali
‘Marriage should be honoured by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.’ –Hebrews 13:4

DE FACTO: Existence without legal or ecclesiastical recognition or sanction.
DE JURE: Existence by right according to law.
The clerk handed an overseas tourist her visa application. Immediately her eye spotted the section called ‘Marital Status,’ from which she could choose one of five options. These included:
[   ]  Single;
[   ]  Married;
[   ]  Divorced;
[   ]  Widowed; and…
[   ] De Facto.
Unclear on the last option, she asked the clerk what it meant. ‘De facto is when a couple lives together without being married,’ he replied.
‘Oh,’ she blurted out, ‘where I come from, we call that ”living in sin.‘”
Cohabitation or ‘The De facto Factor’
One of the disturbing, yet prevalent, trends in the western world is the practice of de facto relationships, also known as ‘cohabitation’ (Note: these terms will be used interchangeably). Whether you call it ‘de facto,’ ‘living in sin,’ ‘live-in girlfriend,’ ‘cohabitation,’ ‘common law,’ or even ‘trial marriage,’ a generation ago it was the exception; it was considered unacceptable, even wrong.
Today this phenomena is on the rise and considered a legal status. One recent statistic in Australia suggested that a whopping 80% of the couples that wed in a single year have lived together in a de facto relationship prior to the wedding (2014, cited by the Australian Bureau of Statistics).[1] A (liberal) Christian denomination in 2001 struck premarital sex and de facto relationships off their sin list, as part of being ‘consistent with society’s ways.’
Acceptance of de facto-living came as a gradual process with the rise of secular humanism and decline of Judeo-Christian moral standards. The culture wars, sexual revolution, contraceptive pill, abortion on demand, postmodernism with its denial of absolutes, have all contributed to this situation. No doubt Hollywood has played a major role in the proliferation of cohabitation. Glamorous high profile actors, usually after one or more failed marriages, move-in with another famous movie star, father children and live a celebrated lifestyle, egged on by gossip columnists who offer bite-size instalments for news-hungry, celebrity-obsessed fans.
Three Types of De facto Relationships
For Most, A Temporary Arrangement: Motivations for cohabitation seem to follow several streams. The first involves those who have never married and have no intention of doing so. They want readily available sex, shared financial resources, and companionship in the home. These living arrangements tend to be temporary; only 18% of these will be together after 5 years. This attitude can be described as a ‘de facto spirit,’ meaning they want the privileges and pleasures of marriage without the commitment and responsibility.
Never married but want to: The second type are also those who never married and are interested in eventual marriage but have a ‘try before you buy’ mindset.
De Facto before Remarriage: Third are those who have undergone divorce, suffer from the ‘once bitten, twice shy’ syndrome, and hence choose a de facto relationship as a necessary precursor to remarriage (if there is to be a marriage). Some older couples may choose to live together outside of marriage so as not to endanger any pension entitlements. Others, afraid of giving up their freedom and identity, choose to cohabitate with their boyfriend or girlfriend. If things don’t work out, they reason, all one needs to do is ‘move out’ without all the complications divorce brings. It’s that simple.
           
Is it? (Short answer: No)
Are There Any Benefits?[2]
Just because something is commonplace and permitted by society does not make it healthy and right. After all, cigarette smoking is legal but it can cost your thousands of dollars a year and have a detrimental effect on your health. Gambling also is legal and look at the trail of trouble and sorrow it has left.
           
Some claim that a de facto relationship helps prepare a couple for marriage and prevents divorce. Does it? Research suggests otherwise: couples that live in a de facto relationship before marriage are more likely to divorce than couples that wait until marriage. One statistic said that of couples who were married twenty years or more, 56% of those who lived as a de facto couple before marriage ended up in divorce, while 29% of those who never cohabited before marriage ended up in divorce. According to the Jubilee Report on cohabitation: ‘The idea that first cohabitations that lead to marriage do not result in an increased rate of divorce is not reflected by this data set: prior cohabitation with a spouse is associated with 60 per cent higher risk of divorce (emphasis mine).
Another study concluded that 75% of married couples were still together when their child turned 16; only 7% of de facto couples can make the same claim. That’s a ten-fold increased for the married couples. In Britain, the direct annual cost of family breakdown is GBP 41.7 billion. The Daily Mail Online, ‘Married Parents Ten Times More Likely to Stay Together,’ Sarah Harris (February 2010).[3]
TO BE CONTINUED:
In Part 02, we will look at the other negatives as well as how to go from ‘de facto to de jure,’ and how to gain legitimacy with God and people.


 FACTS ABOUT COHABITATION[2]

•       Over half of all first marriages are proceeded by cohabitation (University of Wisconsin document)
•       Cohabitation doesn’t reduce the likelihood of divorce–in fact it leads to a higher divorce risk. One study showed 46% higher risk (1992 Journal of Marriage and Family).
•       No positive contribution of cohabitation to marriage has ever been found, not even sexual compatibility, as usually suggest (1993 Journal of Marriage and Family)
•       Cohabitants tend not be as committed as married couples, or prepared to work on their differences (1995 Journal of Family issues)
•       Particularly problematic is the area of serial cohabitation. It generates a greater willingness to dissolve later relationships. (1993 Journal of Family Issues)
•       About 60% of cohabitation ends in marriage (1989 National Study of Cohabitation
•       In general, cohabiting relationships tend to be less satisfactory than marriage relationship-s, with cohabiting couples reporting lower levels of happiness, sexual exclusivity and sexual satisfaction, as well as poorer relationships with parents (Bumpass, Sweet & Cherlin’s 1991 study)
•       After five years, only 10% of cohabiting couples are together. They do not tend to permanency (Bumpass & Sweet’s 1989 study)
•       Married couples have substantial benefits over the unmarried in terms of labour force productivity, physical and mental health, general happiness and longevity (1994 American Journal of Sociology)
•       Annual rates of depression among cohabiting couples is more than three times the married rate. (1990 Psychiatric Disorders in America)
•       Physical and sexual abuse of a spouse is much higher. One study showed evidence of being twice as high (1991 Journal of marriage and family)
•       Abuse is 20 times higher for children with cohabiting, but biological parents, but 33 times greater if the parent was cohabiting with a non-parenting male partner (1993 Family Education trust: London).
•       The 1996 poverty rate was 6% with married parents, but 31 % with cohabiting parents (1996 Journal of Marriage and the Family).
–taken from Leadership NOW! January 2000, page 12.