The balanced Christian life:

What should believers major in: zeal or knowledge? If you know anything about me, you will know that I see this as a clear example of a false dilemma. That is, it is not to be a case of either/or but both/and. We should seek to have zeal AND we should seek to have knowledge. One without the other just does not cut it for the Christian.

Many believers have plenty of knowledge, but they lack any real zeal for God. Head knowledge alone without passion, and life, and the Spirit is not what God is looking for. But the other error is just as bad. Many believers have plenty of zeal, but they have little sound knowledge or understanding of biblical truth and doctrine. They in fact often play down knowledge altogether.

Cults of course thrive on the latter – members often have zeal and passion and commitment, but they are woefully ignorant of basic Bible teaching. They may be really off on doctrine, and will often be told they should not think for themselves, but just go along with whatever their leader tells them.

I know this from first-hand experience, having been in a cult myself long ago. We sure had lots of zeal, but we sure had a lot of dumb ideas as well. In my four-part article discussing my Christian conversion I wrote about some of these weird things we did and believed. As I wrote:

One, a bad interpretation of Scripture – specifically a passage like 2 Corinthians 5:7 which says “we walk by faith, not by sight” – led to some radical first steps. This text obviously meant we see by faith and walk in the Spirit, and need not worry about mere physical sight. So my first task was to take a hammer or a rock and smash my glasses to bits. That I promptly did, and I spent the next five months or so stumbling around the mountains of New Mexico, even getting lost once or twice.

 

You see I have long had terrible eyesight, so this certainly was jumping in the deep end on day one – a real step of faith indeed. But I was ready to do anything in my newfound faith, and so this seemed reasonable to me at the time.

 

Two, given the hippy/Indian/cult nature of this group, we often got back to nature in more ways than one – including running around with no clothes on, at least on our own land – which got us in trouble with the New Mexico police on more than one occasion, including stints in jail.

 

Related to this, we reminded folks that Galatians 5:16 tells us that we walk in the Spirit, not in the flesh. That was our explanation when asked why we walked around shoeless in the ice and snow for example. We had homemade looms and we did weaving which we learned from the Indians, so we made belts and related products, and sold them to outsiders to get a bit of cash.

 

In the winters we would go to fancy ski resorts in the nearby mountains where all these rich skiers and tourists would hang around at. We sold them our weavings, and they were amazed as we walked about barefoot up there in the snow-covered mountains. https://billmuehlenberg.com/2012/06/27/coming-home-my-testimony-part-2/

And there is more:

Thus our big problem was our way-out beliefs. The truth is, we all need the various giftings God has put in the church, and God has appointed teachers and pastors in the Body of Christ to properly instruct young believers. But we had none of that – no teachers, and certainly no commentaries or theology books or volumes on basic biblical hermeneutics.

 

All we had was the distorted views of our leader. And like so many cults, he made it clear that we were about the only true Christians around. Sure, we kept looking for others who believed like we did – but they were very few and far between indeed. As with all cults, we did not “rightly divide” the Word of God.

 

We took things literally where we shouldn’t have. Our main sticking point was the Second Commandment which warns about not making any graven images. We figured it meant what it said – or what we thought it said. We believed it meant no pictures of any kind – no art, no symbols, no illustrations, no photographs, no drawings, no images – zippo.

 

So if we got a can of beans from the supermarket (not buying it from inside, but claiming it from their trash outside, where we got most of our food), we immediately tore off the wrapping with those ghastly images! Once my parents sent me a nice Bible while I was there, thinking that with my new-found faith I would enjoy it.

 

But of course it had those horrendous images inside of it – maps and other pictures, which I ripped out and threw away immediately. So all images of any kind were taboo, and anyone who thought such images were OK was not a real Christian. So as you can imagine, there were not too many other believers around which we could get along with.

 

So in true cult fashion it was us against everyone else; all because we were misinterpreting Scripture on a pretty basic level. We were twisting Scripture, which is the clear mark of a cult, as is an authoritarian leader who demands full allegiance.

 

However there was one very good thing our leader often told us: he said we should always keep praying to know the truth. That we did, and it led to the downfall of the cult. https://billmuehlenberg.com/2012/06/27/coming-home-my-testimony-part-3/

Yep, this was cult city: zeal in abundance, but knowledge and understanding in rather short supply. It is not just cults that operate this way however. Think of a text such as Romans 10:1-4 where Paul says this about the Jews:

Brothers, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for them is that they may be saved. For I bear them witness that they have a zeal for God, but not according to knowledge. For, being ignorant of the righteousness of God, and seeking to establish their own, they did not submit to God’s righteousness. For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes.

They had the zeal, but without proper knowledge and right understanding, it got them nowhere. They missed out on their long-awaited Messiah because of this – at least in good measure. How many others likewise suffer because of a zeal not corralled by intelligence, understanding and right thinking?

On interest, in my morning reading of Scripture, I came upon this from Exodus 31:1-5:

The Lord said to Moses, “See, I have called by name Bezalel the son of Uri, son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, and I have filled him with the Spirit of God, with ability and intelligence, with knowledge and all craftsmanship, to devise artistic designs, to work in gold, silver, and bronze, in cutting stones for setting, and in carving wood, to work in every craft.”

For this job – associated with building the tabernacle – God appointed an artisan with both zeal (filled with God’s Spirit) and knowledge. There was no question of just one or the other, but both. Let’s aim to get the biblical balance right. Let’s love and serve God with passion and zeal, but with knowledge and understanding as well.

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Not everything we read about in Scripture is meant to be copied!

There are various important principles of biblical interpretation. If we keep these in mind, we can avoid a world of trouble – and misunderstanding and misconstruing of the Word of God. Many are fairly basic and straightforward. Some of the key principles are these:

-Study every text in its context
-Compare Scripture with Scripture
-Study difficult passages in the light of those that are more clear

Many more can be mentioned of course, but simply observing there three will help you go a long way in rightly understanding Scripture and avoiding theological error. Another basic principle to keep in mind is the subject of this article.

Not everything described in the Bible is being prescribed. Just because we read about something happening in Scripture does not necessarily mean it is a template for all people for all time. This can be easily illustrated in a humorous fashion.

Some believers seem to seek guidance by closing their eyes, opening their Bible, and putting their finger down on a page, in the hopes that the text pointed to will give them the answer they are looking for. One well-known story makes clear just how foolish this is as a means of determining God’s will:

-A person using this method came up with Matthew 27:5: “Judas went out and hanged himself”.
-A bit troubled, he tried again, and got this: Luke 10:37: “go and do likewise”.
-Being really rattled, he tried one more time, only to get this: John 13:27: “and what thou doest, do quickly”!

The point is obvious. Just because we are told that someone did something in the Bible (like Judas hanging himself) does not mean we should follow suit. While I have written about this matter before, it always is worth revisiting. See this earlier piece for example: https://billmuehlenberg.com/2022/04/24/description-versus-prescription/

Test case: the Patriarchs

Since I am reading again in the Pentateuch, one can find plenty of examples simply by looking at the lives of the Patriarchs. So many things that we see them doing are decidedly NOT something we should emulate and take as an example. 

There are numerous things we could mention. I recently wrote a piece on burial versus cremation. I looked at some Old Testament passages, saying we need to decide what might be the best course. One person said this in a comment:

“I remember that Joseph asked for his bones to be carried back to Canaan Gen 50:25 when they returned to Canaan (nearly 400 years later, Exodus 13:19 ‘Moses took the bones of Joseph with him’), and before that his father, Jacob wanted his body buried with his fathers in Canaan Gen 47:30 so to me it means our bones are important or the place where we are buried is important.”

Yes, quite right: all the Patriarchs wanted to be buried in the same place: a cave of Machpelah. That is certainly descriptive. But whether it is to be prescriptive as well might be another matter. And we know that the Patriarchs also did various other things which we probably should not emulate. For example, they all had multiple wives.

They also heard directly from God, something which we may well not experience – at least not in the same way as they did. Also, they all left their homeland; they all quarrelled with their brothers; they all met their brides at a well.

And then the wives of the three Patriarchs, Sarah, Rebekah and Rachel were all infertile – yet God miraculously opened the wombs of all three. Believers today are not called to follow in their infertility – nor to expect a miraculous healing from it. Also, all three went down in the direction of Egypt, and so on.

But let me mention just one more issue, related to that last point. In at least the case of two of them (Abraham and Isaac), they had beautiful wives, were in a different land, and lied about their wives (saying they were not wives but sisters). In the case of Abraham, this was partly true, as Sarah was his half-sister.

The first case involves Abraham in Egypt. We read about this in Genesis 12:10-20. But he did this again! The second time this happened involved Abimelech. Genesis 20: 1-18 records this story. And Isaac ends up doing much the same as Genesis 26:6-11 discusses.

Once again, what is being described in these passages is not something we must also do. Most of us do not have ravishingly beautiful wives as these men had, and we generally are not travelling in another country where the leaders there want to get to know these women much better. Nor are to lie about it all, even if those other two conditions are met!

Common sense needed

But you get my drift. So much of the narratives portions of Scripture certainly involve lots of descriptive material. But not all of it is meant to be prescriptive. We can even talk about Jesus in this regard. Jesus was circumcised at the end of the eighth day – should we be too?

Jesus never married – should we therefore remain single as well? And Jesus died a horrible death on a cross – should we as well? Sure, we are to live a crucified life, in a spiritual sense. In that and other ways we are to follow in the footsteps of Jesus.

But much of this is just common sense – or hopefully it is. When one son of the Patriarchs, facing sexual temptation, fled out of the room (Joseph in Genesis 39) that is both descriptive and prescriptive. If we ever find ourselves in that sort of situation, we should do exactly the same thing! Get out of there real fast – don’t pray about it or meditate on it!

Many other obvious incidents can be mentioned, such as King Saul consulting the witch of Endor, King David committing adultery and murder, or King Solomon having 1000 wives and concubines, to name but a few. Here were folks that God used for his purposes, yet they all had their flaws – some worse than others.

We of course can emulate such figures when they did that which was right and pleasing to God. But not all that we read about when it comes to various biblical characters is meant to be something we are to do as well. Again, this should be a matter of common sense for us, but sometimes that is lacking in believers. Indeed, I know of one Christian who, appealing to Solomon and others, thinks polygamy is just fine!

So as you dally read your Bibles, use some God-given wisdom in deciding what is to be copied and mimicked and what is simply to be read – or at times, warned about and avoided!

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We have good reason to remain hopeful:

Some of you will recall a major theme of a book penned back in 1946: Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. It has to do with his experience as a prisoner in German concentration camps. He argued that those who had a sense of meaning and purpose – and thus hope – were better equipped to survive in these horrific camps.

Yes, hope is crucial. The Christian faith of course is built on hope. We know that as the world grows ever darker, God is still at work. The psalmist could put it this way:

Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:11)

The writer to the Hebrews said this: “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see” (Hebrews 11:1). Paul put it this way: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13). And we have the blessed hope: the promise of Christ’s return (Titus 2:13).

Hope is what keeps us going. But of course it is hope in Christ, not hope in ourselves or in our surroundings. As the popular song states, “Because he lives, I can face tomorrow.” And that is true even in our most difficult and desperate periods.

One key figure in recent times would have had reason to despair and give up hope. But he kept going, despite a shaky start. He went from the Marines to the White House to prison to a remarkable global Christian ministry. I refer to Chuck Colson (1931-2012). Those not familiar with his amazing story will find it discussed here: https://billmuehlenberg.com/2012/04/22/notable-christians-charles-colson/

In this piece I want to quote from something he wrote over a dozen years ago. It is still well worth revisiting. The book is this: The Sky Is Not Falling (Worthy Publishing, 2011). It is a collection of his columns he had penned for Christianity Today over the years. But the Introduction is still of great value, so here I will present most of it. What follows then is what he wrote, almost in its entirety:

On all sides I hear battle-weary Christians talk about abandoning cultural engagement and tending our own backyard instead. Like other leaders in Christian ministries, I know the most effective fundraising is to screech that the sky is falling, but we should resist that temptation. We should inspire hope.

 

The most compelling reason for hope comes from looking beyond any current election at deeper, long-term historical trends. The twentieth century was the age of ideology, of the great “isms”: communism, socialism, nazism, liberalism, humanism, scientism. Everywhere, ideologues nursed visions of creating the ideal society by some utopian scheme. Whether by revolution or racial purity or scientific technology, these True Believers set out to build a modern Tower of Babel, reaching to the heavens (metaphorically, since most were aggressively secular).

 

The attitude was captured in the film Titanic, when a passenger glances proudly at the ship and declares, “Even God himself could not sink it.”

 

Other idols have sunk just as surely, if not as quickly. Nazism was forever disgraced by the horrors of its concentration camps. The Soviet Union crumbled with the Berlin Wall. Around the globe formerly socialist nations have eagerly lined up to establish free economies. Liberalism, while still powerful, has lost its luster: American politicians eschew the label. Even science often seems a Frankenstein’s monster turning on its creators.

 

This was the most significant fact at the end of the twentieth century: all the major ideological constructions had failed, tossed on the ash heap of history. For all were based on the same underlying theme: liberate the individual from the oppression of family, church, and local custom, and he would be autonomous and free. But today it is clear that weakening the marital bonds of family, church, and neighborhood does not lead to freedom but to alienation, loneliness, disorder, and crime – and even to the rise of the totalitarian state.

 

The dream of autonomy has turned into a nightmare of chaos and coercion. Today the tide is turning as Americans grow desperate for the security found in the moral bonds of family and community.

 

The only remaining “ism” is postmodernism, which is not an ideology but a repudiation of all ideologies. Its relativism is the admission that every attempt to construct a comprehensive, utopian worldview has failed. It is a formalized expression of despair.

 

Only one compelling claim to transcendent truth remains, one secure hope: Christianity. The church has stood unshaken through the ebb and flow of two millennia. It has survived both the barbarian invasions of the Middle Ages and the intellectual assaults of the modern era. Its solid walls rise up above the ruins littered across the intellectual landscape.

 

This moment, when the culture at large is facing the bankruptcy of its systems, is the worst possible time for Christians to despair. On the contrary, it is time for us to blow trumpets and fly the flag high. To desert the field of battle now would be historical blindness, betraying our heritage just when we have the greatest opportunity we may ever face. This is the time to make a compelling case that Christianity offers the only rational and realistic hope for both personal redemption and social renewal.

 

This is not a Pollyanna vision of our culture which ignores the depth of our cultural, governmental, economic, and ethical problems or pretends they are not real and serious. They are appallingly real and deadly serious. And if they are not checked, the sky will fall. Our culture will collapse as surely as that of ancient Israel when they turned away from the protective and life-sustaining principles of God. But collapse is far from inevitable because the church has in its purpose, worldview, ethos, and mission everything needed to turn culture around.

He concludes by saying that the church has the answers to the problems that beset us and surround us. His final sentences are these: “Never has it been more important for Christians to remain engaged in the task of cultural renewal—to stay at our posts. And if we are steadfast, we have no reason to fear that shards of the wild blue yonder will come crashing down on our heads.”

Of course if Colson were still around today, he would see that things have indeed gotten so much worse in so many ways – at least here in the West. But for him – and for us – that should be all the more reason to keep hope alive. As long as God sits on the throne (which will forever be the case), there is still hope.

While we work for cultural, social and political change, as part of our calling to be salt and light, there will always be setbacks and disappointments. But we must persevere. Colson certainly did. He could have abandoned all hope while languishing in prison after the Watergate affair.

But he did not. His new-found faith propelled him into full-time service for the Lord, and as a result millions of people around the world have been impacted by the man and his ministry. We need to seek to do the same, by God’s grace. So keep on going. The sky is not falling, and Christ still reigns.

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Away with your lame excuses – we need to speak out:

If you are a Christian you are commanded to share the good news of the gospel. Obviously our words must be backed up by the way we live, but words MUST be used. Paul made this clear in Romans 10:14-15: “How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? And how are they to preach unless they are sent? As it is written, ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the good news!’”

So in one way or another, the Christian is called to speak. We of course speak about the good news of what Jesus Christ did for lost sinners by his death and resurrection. But there are so many other things we can and should be speaking up about as well.

Many of the hot potato issues of the day should be addressed by believers, and in the public square, whether something like abortion or sexual trafficking. As Proverbs 31:8-9 puts it, “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.”

Sure, not everyone will be an evangelist speaking to thousands of people in a sporting stadium. Not everyone will write books and articles. Not everyone will set up a blog site. Not everyone will have radio and TV ministries. But we all can speak, even if in much more limited and humble ways.

You all have neighbours presumably. Well, start by speaking to them. And pray for them first. As I have shared before, in my twice daily dog walks, I try to pray for all the neighbours as I pass by their homes. Some of them I end up bumping into and having conversations with. Sometimes that can include sharing biblical truth.

Then there are of course family members, friends, and others that you are uniquely placed to speak to. Most of us to not have any connection to your family, to your friends, to your neighbours. So you have a unique mission field right there that none of us have. God expects you to speak.

Again, timing can be crucial, and hopefully you have prepared the way by prayer and intercession. Not every occasion may be ideal for sharing gospel truth. But if you are open to the possibility, if you have prayed, and if you have asked God to open some doors before you, then there can be many great opportunities to speak up.

I have also shared previously about how my personality is not exactly that of being a people person and loving to interact with others, including strangers. But I am slowly getting better in this regard. Indeed, God threw me into the deep end early on.

When I first arrived in Australia and got a job with the Australian Family Association, I received almost no instructions on what to do. The main thing the boss said was that I should try to get into the media a lot. That was it! So I began by writing letters to the editor, putting out press releases, and so on.

It did not take long before many folks in the media knew that I existed, and soon enough they were contacting me on a regular basis. Within a decade or so I had done thousands of interviews and media appearances. Every area was covered: newspaper, radio, television, and so on.

In many ways I became the go-to guy for all things family related, or on moral, social and cultural issues. The media loves controversy, so I was always the token conservative voice, often pitted against an array of leftist voices. So often I stood before a television camera to have something for the 6 o’clock news, or for some current affairs program.

I did heaps of debates, and I had so many appearances in the public arena. I say all this because as I mentioned, I am not exactly Mr Social Butterfly. I am a rather melancholic and misanthropic person, who actually dislikes controversy and the public spotlight. I much prefer to quietly sit at home with a cat on my lap and a book in my hand.

So I always say that God has a great sense of humour. He could have chosen someone who thrives in public and loves to be with others. He could have chosen someone who was photogenic and telegenic. He could have chosen a young articulate, attractive Australian female for the job.

Instead he chose me – an older, American male with no great camara appeal. That is how God so often works. As is often said, God does not call the qualified, but he qualifies the called. Given that there was little in me that the media would desire, I had to depend on God for any chance of success.

In the eyes of the world, I should have been the last person chosen for such a major media role over so many years. I broke all the rules of who you would want to be a media spokesperson. But of course God does not look at appearances, but looks at the heart (1 Samuel 16:7).

He will use those who are willing to be used. He will use those who remain humble before him. He will use those who seek to be obedient. Those are our main qualifications to be Christians in general, and to speak truth in public in particular. Not that I am expert in any of those areas, but…

I am not saying there is not a place for, say, taking courses in public speaking, or for trying to brush up for your next media appearance, and so on. But your main qualification is the call of God. Your main qualification is that God is willing to use you, and there is a needy world out there that really does need to hear what you have to say.

So even if you think you are the last person who God would ever put in the public spotlight, or have a big role in the media, think again. God may well have someone like you in mind. If you think you are already fully qualified for the job, well, spiritually speaking you may not be! If you think you are not up to the task, you might be the very person God is looking for.

We of course have clear biblical examples of this. Just think of two of the most important spokesmen for God in the entire Bible. Both seemed to think they were not qualified for the job. Both may have had natural weaknesses or shortcomings, but God was able to supernaturally overcome and transcend these things as he used these men greatly.

You likely know who I refer to here. The first of course is Moses. Twice we have a biblical record of Moses protesting, saying he lacks the proper qualifications to be God’s spokesperson. And at least once we have God giving him a stern rebuke. The first passage is Exodus 4:10-17. It says this:

But Moses said to the Lord, “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.” Then the Lord said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.” But he said, “Oh, my Lord, please send someone else.” Then the anger of the Lord was kindled against Moses and he said, “Is there not Aaron, your brother, the Levite? I know that he can speak well. Behold, he is coming out to meet you, and when he sees you, he will be glad in his heart. You shall speak to him and put the words in his mouth, and I will be with your mouth and with his mouth and will teach you both what to do. He shall speak for you to the people, and he shall be your mouth, and you shall be as God to him. And take in your hand this staff, with which you shall do the signs.”

And in Exodus 6:10-13 we find this:

So the Lord said to Moses, “Go in, tell Pharaoh king of Egypt to let the people of Israel go out of his land.” But Moses said to the Lord, “Behold, the people of Israel have not listened to me. How then shall Pharaoh listen to me, for I am of uncircumcised lips?” But the Lord spoke to Moses and Aaron and gave them a charge about the people of Israel and about Pharaoh king of Egypt: to bring the people of Israel out of the land of Egypt.

The other familiar character is Jeremiah the prophet. As Jeremiah 1:4-10 states:

Now the word of the Lord came to me, saying,

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you;
I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”

Then I said, “Ah, Lord God! Behold, I do not know how to speak, for I am only a youth.” But the Lord said to me,

“Do not say, ‘I am only a youth’;
for to all to whom I send you, you shall go,
and whatever I command you, you shall speak.
Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
declares the Lord.”

Then the Lord put out his hand and touched my mouth. And the Lord said to me,

“Behold, I have put my words in your mouth.
See, I have set you this day over nations and over kingdoms,
to pluck up and to break down,
to destroy and to overthrow,
to build and to plant.”

Both these men tried to excuse themselves from speaking for God. But God would have none of it. Many of us may also want to make excuses and claim we are just not up to the task. Well, I have good news for you: NONE of us are up to the task. None of us are qualified. None of us are sufficient in and of ourselves.

But God, in order to bring glory to himself, chooses to use the unqualified, the amateur, the nobody. As Paul states in 1 Corinthians 1:26-31:

For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth.  But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption,  so that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.”

In my book that is very good news indeed. So go, and speak, even if your voice shakes.

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Sometimes we need to accept ourselves as God made us:

One truth that cannot be denied is that God has made us all different. No two human beings are fully alike – not even identical twins. While we all do have much in common with one another, we are still fully unique as individuals, certainly in areas such as our personalities, character traits, preferences, temperaments, and so on.

So while believers should seek to strive for unity in the Body of Christ, this is not to come at the expense of our diversity – of our God given uniqueness and differences. There are no cookie-cutter people, and there are no cookie-cutter Christians.

And it is good to celebrate our differences. This can even be the case with big ticket items. Some folks are clearly introverts while others are clearly extroverts. While some of us introverts can learn to become more talkative and sociable, we need not deny who we are.

The truth is, I have never been a real people person. I am usually fairly content to do stuff alone, at least much of my work and my ministry. In that sense I am self-directed, and I do not a team of others with me to help me perform my God-given tasks. I am fine as is, thanks.

However, God does not intend for any of us be fully alone. He made us for community, and he made us to need and depend on one another. But still, in all that, there is a place for diversity and difference. Some folks need others and want to be around others more than some of us do.

The other day I posted this on the social media:

I understand that Melbourne is, or will soon be, the Australian city with the biggest population. Oddly however, in my twice daily brief walk with Jilly dog, I often will not meet a single soul. Where is everybody? I guess they are all holed up in their homes, or offices, or businesses, or shops. As an old single guy, I might be getting lonely, but I sometimes think it would be nice to chat with a real human being in the flesh now and then!

Not too long thereafter I also posted this:

There are different kinds of loneliness, just as there are different kinds of people. Some people will still be quite lonely even with a large group of people, including in a church. And yes, steps can be taken to deal with this, but one size does not fit all. Even being in a small group (I have been in many over the years) is not always the answer. And I have known of some men’s groups where sports and cars are the main focus of discussion! Um, that is not for me!

Both posts generated a fair amount of talk and discussion. As regards the first one, I was really not complaining so much about being alone. I was mostly making an observation. But yes, without my wife of 41 ½ years, things can become a bit lonely at times. And mind you, if I did not have a dog to walk, I suppose I would be holed up in my home even more than I am now!

So in some respects it is up to me if I want to have a bit more of a social life. There is a proverb that comes to mind here: “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly” (Proverbs 18:24, KJV). If we want friends, but are having trouble making them, we need to start being a bit more friendly.

As to my second post, it in part was in response to those who replied by saying I should just get myself into church life. Well, of course for almost all my Christian life I have been actively a part of various churches. But two years of covid and a year and a half of her cancer pretty much curtailed all that. So I may need to get back into things here.

And regarding my remark about certain men’s groups, some Christians will say things like this: ‘Well Bill, you should stay in that group and steer it back into a much more godward direction.’ Yes, IF that is what God wants me do specifically do, then it is a goer. But it may just as likely that he might want me out, so I do not spiritually starve while trying to be the hero there.

(Let me digress here a bit: many believers have said they are not always keen about small groups, or even sometimes about church itself! There are many reasons for this, but perhaps this explains why this older article has been seen, liked, shared and commented on more than any other of my pieces: https://billmuehlenberg.com/2014/12/26/on-leaving-church/ )

But as mentioned, some of these issues come down to personality types and the like. Many Christians were quite interested in a 1966 book by Tim LaHaye called Spirit-Controlled Temperament (1966). In it he discussed the four main temperament types: melancholic, choleric, sanguine, and phlegmatic.

He followed that up with Transforming Your Temperament (1971). In it and other books he sought to show how on the one hand, our temperaments are part of who we are, but on the other hand, God can help work on them, removing some weaknesses or strengthening other areas, etc. Many believers found these volumes to be quite helpful, especially in terms of where a believer might best fit in in terms of church work, ministry, or missions.

And various personality assessment tests over the years have been used as well, such as the Myers-Briggs test. Many churches have used these over the years, and there can be a place for all of them. But we always must realise that God is in the business of changing lives, so we cannot slavishly say ‘This is my temperament and God made me this way, so I cannot change.’

We need to get the balance right in terms of accepting ourselves for how God made us, but also in being willing with God’s help to make some changes in some areas where it is clear that change is needed. For a misanthrope and melancholic like myself, that does NOT mean I need to become Joe Extrovert, the life of the party – a gregarious social butterfly.But it has meant that I have had to learn how to be more sociable, to be more people-orientated, and to try not to be so reluctant to be around others and in large gatherings at times. Having a few role models around me in this regard has helped as well.

With all this in mind, some of you might quite like a recent volume penned by Christian counsellor and journalist Holley Gerth: The Powerful Purpose of Introverts: Why the World Needs You to Be You (Revell, 2020). It concludes by saying, “Let’s be who we are”. Yes, there are different temperaments and character traits, and yes God can change these to various degrees, but sometimes we need to recognise who God made us to be.

She looks at all this in some detail. She even cites research showing how who we are in terms of extroversion or introversion may be hardwired into our brains:

Approximately two-thirds of the energy our brains use goes to electrical impulses that help neurons communicate. Neurotransmitters play a role in that process. The dopamine-based reward network, which causes people to “become more talkative, alert to their surroundings, and motivated to take risks and explore the environment” is more active in extroverts.

 

As a quick review: Dopamine energizes extroverts but overwhelms introverts. Acetylcholine, another feel-good brain chemical, releases when we turn inward or engage in quieter activities. While introverts can be adventurous and fun-loving, lower-energy activities make us feel best. Extroverts may perceive this as “tired,” but it’s just a different way of enjoying life. (p. 145)

So to expect that we can just completely change our personality and temperament by a snap of the fingers or some prayer service may not be very wise – just as it is unwise to use who we are as an excuse to not make necessary adjustments and changes in our personality and social relationships.

As to the assessment tests I mentioned above, she says this: “Personality tests give us starting places for understanding ourselves and each other, but they never get the final say.” (p. 38) Learning about who we are is a very important first step, but that does not mean we are locked into where we are at. Some changes can be made with God’s help.

Let me share a quote about one well-known person that others like myself might find encouraging:

With a net worth of 77 billion dollars, introvert Warren Buffett is one of the world’s most successful investors. But you’d never know from his calendar. Buffett’s business partner Charlie Munger says, “You look at his schedule sometimes and there’s a haircut. Tuesday, haircut day. That’s what created one of the world’s most successful business records in history. He has a lot of time to think.”

 

For his entire career, Buffett spent, by his own estimation, 80 percent of his time thinking and reading. In a world that tells us only “busy people” make progress, Buffett’s reflection-based approach to life and business is an act of rebellion. But it’s one that has paid off. (p. 157)

The truth is, it is OK to be an introvert. We can be OK with who we are because God was OK with making us who we are. Citing the story of Elijah (in 1 Kings 19), she says this: “What if we, as introverts, are created to be living echoes of the gentle whisper of God? What if that’s why the world needs us to be who we are? What if that’s our powerful purpose?” (p. 170)

If there is something to all this, then that can be a relief for many of us who have grown tired of trying to measure up to all the bright, bubbly, loud, people-person types who are out there and seem to get so much attention – even in the Christian world. Maybe we can just be who God made us to be, and not apologise for it nor worry about it.

Gerth believes we must learn to start living as we were created to be. Again, that does not mean never seeking much needed-growth and development as people, and as Christians. But it does mean we can start to be comfortable in our own skins, and not worry about comparing ourselves with others. To use the words of Gandalf to Frodo, “And that may be an encouraging thought.”

Brief afterword

Let me mention just one downside to the book: Gerth does spend a few pages on the Enneagram (pp. 40-43), without pointing out any concerns with it. I have written about this before, demonstrating that it is an occultic tool and is really is not something Christians should get themselves involved in: https://billmuehlenberg.com/2022/01/10/beware-the-enneagram/

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